Anxiety as a Christian

I experienced trauma at a very young age, the earliest I remember is when I was six years old. I know it is due to all the trauma I’ve had in my life that I suffer with anxiety. I wanted to discuss how to deal with anxiety as a Christian and some techniques I use which help reduce the effect it has on my daily life. These techniques may cross over into other conditions you may be dealing with, mentally, physically or otherwise, and reduce the impact they have on your daily life.

Before I move onto the techniques I use let me explain to you what it looks like for me. Everyone is different so this isn’t a prescription for symptoms everyone with anxiety deals with, but I feel unless it deserves more of an explanation. A term banded about a lot, which just invalidates how you are feeling and never really helps the healing process, is that you should stop worrying about something that will likely never happen. Whilst on the surface this is true. Those of us who have dealt with trauma are not worrying about something that may never happen, our bodies are trying to protect us from what has already happened from happening again.

Anxiety in and of itself is really a warning system to your body. If you are in the middle of the woods and a grizzly bear is staring you down, you will start to feel those symptoms of anxiety which is your body preparing you to run and get out of the woods. It is there for good reason as a survival mechanism. It becomes an issue when your body is seemingly constantly preparing you in a fight or flight response when there is no real danger around you. Your body gets stuck in this survival mode. This is what happened to me.

The symptoms I have struggled most with that usually come all at once include: palpitations, extreme nausea – sometimes vomiting, shaking limbs, like I can’t feel myself breathe, burning skin, extreme dry mouth, sweating, heavy limbs and I can go into a freeze state where it becomes very difficult for me to move. The list is not exhaustive of what I have dealt with through times when the anxiety I suffered with was at it’s peak but give a general idea.

The last 8-10 months have been extremely hard and for a few short months I was experiencing these symptoms daily and intensely to the point I couldn’t do much of anything. My brain wanted to but my body just wouldn’t let me. I stopped being able to drive without getting shaky legs – and I love to drive, I love the freedom of just being able to go to the beach whenever I wanted to.

Now as a Christian I knew this was not the life God had for me, I knew I had an extremely difficult life so far with all the trauma I had been through and even though I had periods of life where things were more “normal” for me I kept having the odd year where I would completely burn out and these symptoms would overtake my life for a while. In a previous blog (read here) I have talked about the word God gave me for last year being restoration with the verse from Joel 2:25. It is now indeed the verse attached to this ministry. I knew things needed to change. The years of CBT therapy and counselling only helped short term. I knew I needed to tackle the root cause rather than just the behaviour. And so I did a deep dive into healing root causes and the effect has been dramatic. God has really done some work on me these last 12 months and brought me out of the dark place.

Now as I sit here struggling with anxiety in a way I haven’t for the last few months I am confident the techniques I have put in place and use daily are why it is not flooring me in the same way it used to. It’s why I can just allow these feelings to pass through my body knowing that in a day or two I’ll be back to my usual energetic self, rather than it taking months to regulate my nervous system.

So let me take you through the techniques that have helped me in reducing the anxiety I have suffered with by around 80%. Throughout all of this I am teaching my body to feel safe. When you have been through trauma and you don’t know what safety feels like this is a process. Healing is possible and you can thrive but it takes effort. It is a daily practice. Much in the same way we study the word of God and have a close relationship with him so that we are not swayed when the battles come. We practice these techniques so that when anxiety comes we have a better way of working through it so it doesn’t knock us down in the same way it did before. We are not promised a life free of troubles but with practice we can reduce the effect it has on us. We need to learn how to regulate our nervous system.

The first thing I did was use biblical affirmations. I had a lot of negative core beliefs. I didn’t know who I was before trauma occurred. I had to dig deep during this process and I had a Christian Mental Health Coach to help guide me in this. Some of those negative beliefs included that I was unloveable, a burden to others, inadequate etc. In order to pull these beliefs out at the root I started to declare over myself the truth of God’s Word. Also rather than just declare the truth I also rejected the lie. Let me give you an example.

“I reject the lie that I am unloved, shameful or rejected. I accept and receive the truth that I am a child of God (John 1:12), I am a friend of Jesus (John 15:15), I belong to God (1 Cor 6:19-20), I am adopted as a daughter of the one true King (Eph 1:5) and I am forgiven (Col 1:14)”

I have a list of around 13 of these that I repeat over myself and I would look at myself in the mirror to say these. At first this was difficult because I didn’t really believe them in my heart. I knew them in my head. I knew intellectually how God felt about me but I didn’t know it in my heart, not truly. This was a daily practice but I knew when a shift had occurred. I started to carry myself differently. Old trauma wounds were not triggered any more. I felt more connected to God. It really has made a huge difference to the mindset I have and how I feel about myself. Too often we can fall into a shame spiral or believe things that are just not true. If it does not align with the Word of God then it is not truth.

Another daily practice that has helped me so much is keeping a gratitude journal. My coach posted one to me and in it I write 3 things each day that I am grateful for. They don’t have to be big things. For me when I first started it would be things like, I managed to take a shower or I ate properly today. Just really simple things. Our brains naturally have a negativity bias and what you focus on becomes bigger. So by doing this daily practice and training your brain to look for the things that bring you joy, you will naturally begin to see all the things you are thankful for. It also helps looking back for me to see how God has been close to me, covering me and answering my prayers. I have found this too has helped my mindset so much.

The third thing that has given me so much more freedom are somatic exercises. These are exercises that reset the Vagus Nerve. I’m not at all medical so please don’t take this as official advice etc. If you are currently suffering with anxiety or any other diagnosis (official or otherwise) then please consult with those professionals regarding your treatment etc. That being said, these exercises reduced my anxiety, increased my energy and generally help to reset my nervous system. I do them twice a day, certain ones more. There is no easy way to explain these exercises without pictures or video link but they are generally easily accessible these days. I am currently writing the 2^nd edition of my devotional book and this will have the pictures and descriptions in there in more detail.

Techniques such as the physiological sigh help when I’m in the middle of an anxiety attack to slow the heart rate and regulate the breathing. Bilateral movement helps also. You have to find what works for you. I noticed a significant shift in how my body responds to triggers now and how it no longer takes months to recover. A day to make time for myself, focus on something that brings me joy, connect with a friend, walk in nature. All of those things help dramatically. Also understanding anxiety is not my identity, it is not who I am. It is something I struggle with. I know I will not struggle with it forever. I know I will not have complex trauma forever. Whatever God is walking me through will be used for his glory.

It is not a sin to struggle with mental illness. It is not a sin to take medication. Do not allow condemnation to have a seat at your table. You are a child of God, born for a purpose with a calling on your life. You will thrive regardless of what you struggle with. It is possible. Sometimes the first step is being able to imagine it. If you can imagine it with the eyes of your heart, it can be yours. Follow the leading of the Holy Spirit, study the bible and find out what God says about you and the endless promises he has for each of his children. God wants to hear from you, he wants to have a close relationship with you and answer all of your prayers. There is no quota on the blessings or answers you receive. God doesn’t hear your prayer then say, “sorry, I’ve already answered 3 of your prayers this month, come back on the 1^st and I’ll see what I can do.” No. God wants to pour out his blessings upon you til your cup is overflowing and you can hardly contain all that he has for you.

Rest in him. He’s got you and you’ve got this. Amen.